Age or Gender? Either is a Problem

OSN Responds To Critics

Orange Street News publisher Hilde Kate Lysiak responds to critics who tell her she is too young to be reporting news and should instead be "playing with dol...

Criticism

I do not take issue with the criticism of Hilde's actual report. Criticism is standard fare for journalist. 

Gender

However comments such as the following make my brain want to explode.

          "9 year old girls should be playing with dolls not trying to be reporters."

          "I'm disgusted that this cute little girl thinks she is a real journalist. What happened to tea parties?"

This has less to do with age than it does with "cute little girls" veering away from their social and gender imposed roles. How dare she choose to be Barbara Walters instead of a Disney Princess (awaiting her Prince).

My dear powerful girls you can do what you want to do, be what you want to be, and go where you want to go. It is not your job to make others feel comfortable with your decisions or adequate about their own. 

In the words of Hilde Kate Lysiak:  "There. Is that cute enough for you?" 

Age

Learning is about encouraging interests, curiosity, enthusiasm, and taking risks.  These qualities should be nurtured not diminish.  Our children have all of these qualities when they enter the world, yet somehow we manage to choke it out of them.  

Informally when we tell them you can't, you shouldn't, you're to young/old, etc.  

Formally, saddest of all, when they enter school and are put on a one-size-fits-all conveyor belt of education that offers them little choice or voice and makes them compete against each other in the process.  

It matters not what one's particular talents and gifts to humanity may be or could be.  School is where you will be ranked, sorted, and tracked based on an antiquated system that compare similar, yet uniquely different, individuals exactly the same.  Is it any wonder that our children enter school eager to learn then leave (graduation or otherwise) believing that learning, thus education, is a drudgery that must be suffered through.  

Our children need us to help them in search of their destiny not determine it for them.

It's Not You, It's Me

There is an enormous amount of great information available online.  I am continually being validated, challenged, and/or provoked by other professionals.   I appreciate others' insight and wisdom.  It is important that we continue to share the joys and challenges of student and adult learning.  

There is nothing better than a passionate discussion with a variety of professional perspectives and opinions. Regardless, of how strongly I feel about the topic at hand, I always walk away with something I had not thought of, need to learn more about, or need to reconsider.  

A few days ago I read Employers' Challenge To Educators: Make School Relevant To Students' Lives (+MindShift).  After reading the article I perused the comments to that continue the conversation and can provide additional insights to the topic.  I was taken aback by many of the postings. So much so that I returned to the article and reread it (more than once).  Still I could not see what brought on the defensive/attack-like comments.  

Granted, we all interpret through our personal lens, and online discussions are not the best for understanding the person behind the comments.  However, I have experienced this throughout my career; defensiveness over self-reflection.  

Educators seem to make the worst students.  We tend to be very defensive and to deflect from ourselves, our practices, and/or our system, whenever there are recommendations for improvement.   Too often we are preoccupied with proving "It's not me/us" that we perceive blame where none was intended, and we miss an opportunity to learn from others.  As the world is ever-changing so must we change and adapt to it.  

It is rarely about the wrong or right we make it into (teacher vs. administrator, education vs. business, K-12 vs. higher education, educators vs. parents, content vs. skills, etc.).  As we know better we do better.  It is our reality that what is right today, may be wrong tomorrow, and right again next week!

We must listen and reflect on what our community--students, parents, employers, employees, etc.--have to say about their needs.  We are the beginning not the end of the process. When we allow the discussion to become about us, it is no longer about students and learning.  Regardless of where the divisiveness originated we are obligated to overcome it; to listen, be open, and willing to consider there may be a better way.

Immediately dismissing another's input is reciprocal and diminishes our mission and the profession.  

I wonder how differently things would be if we started with this premise? "It's not you, it's me." Regardless of the answer, by examining our own thoughts, behaviors, habits, and practices, I believe something valuable will be discovered by the process. That discovery will help everyone in the community move forward--together!  

DON'T ASK—DON'T TELL?

It is time for students to begin returning to school.  What should be an exciting time for all is, for too many, a time of anxiety and fear; fear of how they will be treated because they are (or perceived as) lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender (LGBT).  Will they be bullied, laughed at, the target of slurs, or excluded?  Will they have to hide or deny who they are in order to be a valued member of their school community?

The +GLSEN  2013 National School Climate Survey concluded the vast majority of LGBT students in Missouri regularly heard anti-LGBT remarks.  Remarks such as, "gay" used in a negative way (e.g., "that's so gay"), homophobic remarks (e.g., "fag" or "dyke"), negative remarks about gender expression, and/or negative remarks about transgender people.

If asked, no one would disagree that schools should be a safe haven for ALL students.  But for LGBT students the expectation for this haven may be at the cost of cloaking their authentic selves. In other words: Don’t ask—Don’t tell.  

Some believe the best solution is to not bring attention to yourself or your circumstances as to not invite problems.  Simply put this approach is wrong.  It is dismissing the emotional wellbeing of LGBT students for the sake of individuals whom at best are uninformed or uncomfortable or at worst homo/transphobic.

In your school:

• Do the adults feel a responsibility to educating themselves to better understand LGBT individuals?
• Do teachers/administrators take the lead in meeting the needs of LGBT students or wait until there is a district policy or law enforcing it?
• Are “jokes” allowed or overlooked as long as no LGBT individuals hear it?
• Do people immediately jump to the conclusion that every image with rainbow colors is promoting a “gay agenda?”
• Are there individuals that take every available opportunity to express their personal anti-LGBT views?
• Would you confront and/or willingly report a fellow educator for discriminatory behavior toward LGBT individuals?

As educators it is our duty to advocate for all students.  That means calling out behaviors that are negative toward any individual or group.  

Silence condones.  

It is essential that we confront these behaviors in classrooms, hallways, locker rooms, fields, courts, cafeterias, teacher lounges, offices, or meetings—everywhere and always.      

Although, the focus of this writing has been on students, the reality is this is about all LGBT persons, including educators themselves.  It is naive to believe LGBT students feel welcomed, accepted, and valued in schools if LGBT teachers remain cloaked and hidden. That is a loud and clear message: "You tolerate me because you have to.  You do not value me."  

This is about human rights.  Our public schools are built on the premise of equal rights for all. As educators we must honor the sanctity of human rights above all else.  Not to do so is malpractice.  +Human Rights Campaign